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	<title>Yes, It&#039;s My Real Name</title>
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	<description>The Assorted Works of Chris Illuminati</description>
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		<title>Yes, It&#039;s My Real Name</title>
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		<title>Machine of Death: Ink Poisoning</title>
		<link>http://chrisilluminati.wordpress.com/2011/11/23/machine-of-death-ink-poisoning/</link>
		<comments>http://chrisilluminati.wordpress.com/2011/11/23/machine-of-death-ink-poisoning/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 23 Nov 2011 16:36:49 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>chrisilluminati</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[FICTION]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Fiction]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Machine of Death]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://chrisilluminati.wordpress.com/?p=151</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[(A couple months ago, the people behind the Machine of Death book series had an open call for submissions. To get an idea of what they were looking for, check out their call for entries. I submitted a story titled &#8216;Ink Poisoning&#8217; and got the word back a few weeks ago it was not accepted. So [...]<img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=chrisilluminati.wordpress.com&amp;blog=4569218&amp;post=151&amp;subd=chrisilluminati&amp;ref=&amp;feed=1" width="1" height="1" />]]></description>
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		<title>From Slim Goodbody to the Fresh Beat Band</title>
		<link>http://chrisilluminati.wordpress.com/2011/08/03/from-slim-goodbody-to-the-fresh-beat-band/</link>
		<comments>http://chrisilluminati.wordpress.com/2011/08/03/from-slim-goodbody-to-the-fresh-beat-band/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 03 Aug 2011 14:53:34 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>chrisilluminati</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[ARTICLES]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://chrisilluminati.wordpress.com/?p=143</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[I&#8217;m more upset than a grown man should be when an actor on a kids’ TV show gets replaced. Click here to read my latest on The Good Men Project.<img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=chrisilluminati.wordpress.com&amp;blog=4569218&amp;post=143&amp;subd=chrisilluminati&amp;ref=&amp;feed=1" width="1" height="1" />]]></description>
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		<title>It Takes More Than a Shirt</title>
		<link>http://chrisilluminati.wordpress.com/2011/07/21/it-takes-more-than-a-shirt/</link>
		<comments>http://chrisilluminati.wordpress.com/2011/07/21/it-takes-more-than-a-shirt/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 21 Jul 2011 19:30:50 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>chrisilluminati</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[ARTICLES]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://chrisilluminati.wordpress.com/?p=140</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Just because your baby’s shirt says you’re the World’s Greatest Dad, it doesn’t mean you are. My latest on The Good Men Project.<img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=chrisilluminati.wordpress.com&amp;blog=4569218&amp;post=140&amp;subd=chrisilluminati&amp;ref=&amp;feed=1" width="1" height="1" />]]></description>
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		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
	
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			<media:title type="html">ParentsObey</media:title>
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		<title>Daddy Bloggers&#8230;WE DO EXIST!</title>
		<link>http://chrisilluminati.wordpress.com/2011/07/07/daddy-bloggers-we-do-exist/</link>
		<comments>http://chrisilluminati.wordpress.com/2011/07/07/daddy-bloggers-we-do-exist/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 07 Jul 2011 16:05:56 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>chrisilluminati</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[ARTICLES]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://chrisilluminati.wordpress.com/?p=132</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Tracy Davidson of NBC Philadelphia talks with Chris Illuminati, writer of the daddy blog Message with a Bottle. Click here to watch the video. <img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=chrisilluminati.wordpress.com&amp;blog=4569218&amp;post=132&amp;subd=chrisilluminati&amp;ref=&amp;feed=1" width="1" height="1" />]]></description>
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		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
	
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			<media:title type="html">chrisilluminati</media:title>
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		<title>Effeminate Lumberjacks and Stuffed Turtles</title>
		<link>http://chrisilluminati.wordpress.com/2011/07/05/effeminate-lumberjacks-and-stuffed-turtles/</link>
		<comments>http://chrisilluminati.wordpress.com/2011/07/05/effeminate-lumberjacks-and-stuffed-turtles/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 05 Jul 2011 14:01:07 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>chrisilluminati</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[ARTICLES]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://chrisilluminati.wordpress.com/?p=128</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[One of the most frequently asked questions right after I tell a person that I’m a stay-at-home dad is “So what do the two of you do all day?” I never know how to answer because there really isn’t one simple answer. So I wrote about the average day. Click here to read more. <img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=chrisilluminati.wordpress.com&amp;blog=4569218&amp;post=128&amp;subd=chrisilluminati&amp;ref=&amp;feed=1" width="1" height="1" />]]></description>
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		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
	
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			<media:title type="html">dad1</media:title>
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		<title>Before You Were Born: The Real Jersey Shore</title>
		<link>http://chrisilluminati.wordpress.com/2011/06/29/before-you-were-born-the-real-jersey-shore/</link>
		<comments>http://chrisilluminati.wordpress.com/2011/06/29/before-you-were-born-the-real-jersey-shore/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 29 Jun 2011 18:21:38 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>chrisilluminati</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[ARTICLES]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Jersey Shore]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Nerve.com]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[parents]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://chrisilluminati.wordpress.com/?p=122</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Even decades before Seaside Heights, NJ became synonymous with Snooki and the show Jersey Shore, the town was the summer destination for Jersey teens looking to smush and let off steam. It was also the place where my parents met. Click here to read more.<img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=chrisilluminati.wordpress.com&amp;blog=4569218&amp;post=122&amp;subd=chrisilluminati&amp;ref=&amp;feed=1" width="1" height="1" />]]></description>
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		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
	
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			<media:title type="html">1_3</media:title>
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		<title>The King Is Dead</title>
		<link>http://chrisilluminati.wordpress.com/2011/06/22/the-king-is-dead/</link>
		<comments>http://chrisilluminati.wordpress.com/2011/06/22/the-king-is-dead/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 22 Jun 2011 18:25:33 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>chrisilluminati</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[FICTION]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://chrisilluminati.wordpress.com/?p=115</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[At one point, very early in my writing career, I was obsessed with winning a writing contest. No idea why. I guess it&#8217;s just the kid in me thinking &#8220;if I can beat other people at something, and win an award for it, then that means I&#8217;m great at it.&#8221; The cash prize didn&#8217;t hurt [...]<img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=chrisilluminati.wordpress.com&amp;blog=4569218&amp;post=115&amp;subd=chrisilluminati&amp;ref=&amp;feed=1" width="1" height="1" />]]></description>
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		<slash:comments>2</slash:comments>
	
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			<media:title type="html">Picture 001_19</media:title>
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			<media:title type="html">chrisilluminati</media:title>
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		<title>Bryce Harper: Baseball’s Next Bad Guy</title>
		<link>http://chrisilluminati.wordpress.com/2011/06/20/bryce-harper-baseball%e2%80%99s-next-bad-guy/</link>
		<comments>http://chrisilluminati.wordpress.com/2011/06/20/bryce-harper-baseball%e2%80%99s-next-bad-guy/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 20 Jun 2011 18:25:37 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>chrisilluminati</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[ARTICLES]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://chrisilluminati.wordpress.com/?p=111</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Bryce Harper is just what baseball needs to bring back the casual, and lazy, sports fan. Click here to read why.<img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=chrisilluminati.wordpress.com&amp;blog=4569218&amp;post=111&amp;subd=chrisilluminati&amp;ref=&amp;feed=1" width="1" height="1" />]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://chrisilluminati.wordpress.com/2011/06/20/bryce-harper-baseball%e2%80%99s-next-bad-guy/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
	
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			<media:title type="html">0608_large</media:title>
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			<media:title type="html">chrisilluminati</media:title>
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		<title>You&#8217;re Not The First</title>
		<link>http://chrisilluminati.wordpress.com/2011/06/16/youre-not-the-first/</link>
		<comments>http://chrisilluminati.wordpress.com/2011/06/16/youre-not-the-first/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 16 Jun 2011 13:17:27 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>chrisilluminati</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[ARTICLES]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://chrisilluminati.wordpress.com/?p=107</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Next time you find yourself going through hell, remember, somebody else has been there, too. Check out my first article on the Good Men Project.<img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=chrisilluminati.wordpress.com&amp;blog=4569218&amp;post=107&amp;subd=chrisilluminati&amp;ref=&amp;feed=1" width="1" height="1" />]]></description>
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		<slash:comments>5</slash:comments>
	
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			<media:title type="html">FatherSon</media:title>
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		<title>Easily the stupidest song ever written…</title>
		<link>http://chrisilluminati.wordpress.com/2011/06/10/easily-the-stupidest-song-ever-written%e2%80%a6/</link>
		<comments>http://chrisilluminati.wordpress.com/2011/06/10/easily-the-stupidest-song-ever-written%e2%80%a6/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 10 Jun 2011 20:27:45 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>chrisilluminati</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[BLOG]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://chrisilluminati.wordpress.com/?p=84</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[I wanna be crystal clear on this little ditty: the dude is unhappy with his woman, so answers a personal ad by a woman who is also unhappy. It seems perfect because they both like the same crappy things; fruity drinks, getting soaked to their underwear (not in the good way), neither a fan of [...]<img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=chrisilluminati.wordpress.com&amp;blog=4569218&amp;post=84&amp;subd=chrisilluminati&amp;ref=&amp;feed=1" width="1" height="1" />]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://chrisilluminati.wordpress.com/2011/06/10/easily-the-stupidest-song-ever-written%e2%80%a6/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>9</slash:comments>
	
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